how to win your ex back

10 Steps to win your Ex back in Style

We’ve all pined for an ex at some point in time – probably more times than we’d like to admit. If you’ve been guilty of stalking an ex on social media, drunk texting them in the middle of the night, or comparing them with every new prospect you meet, you’re not alone. Sadly, this kind of desperate behavior does impress anyone. Begging your ex to take you back can only make things worse. Therefore, let me tell you the 10 steps to win your ex back in style!

Most of the time, chasing an ex is a bad idea; hence, the purpose of this post is not to encourage creepy or irrational behavior. However, not all break-ups are the same. Sometimes relationships fall apart because of trivial reasons, and many couples get back together for the long run. Love heals old wounds and it makes sense to not give up on somebody you consider to be your soul mate.

If you truly believe that your ex is special and you need to get them back to achieve your happily ever after, this post could be useful. Nonetheless, acknowledge that love cannot be forced. If your ex doesn’t feel the same way about you deep down, sooner or later you will have to let go.

1.    Give them Space

After a breakup, it is necessary to give your ex some time and space to process their emotions. Respect their boundaries and avoid bombarding them with messages or requests to give your relationship another chance. You also need to spend some time apart and figure out what you really want. It is commonplace to experience loneliness and despair right after a breakup, but you regain emotional balance after sufficient time has passed.  

Constant attempts to force your ex into taking you back are likely to drive them further away. Cut off contact for a while and focus on your personal growth during this time. A calm and more mature version of you is going to be far more appealing to your ex.

2.    Embark on a journey of Self-improvement

Relationships fail because at least one of two partners was not happy with the other. If you realize that your own shortcomings and mistakes were the reason for the breakup, it is time to focus on you. Use the time apart to work on becoming the best version of yourself. Engage in activities that make you happy, pursue your passions, and improve your physical and mental well-being. Showing personal growth and self-confidence can make you more attractive in the eyes of your ex.

Reflect on the past; figure out what went wrong in the relationship and your role in it. Identify any patterns or issues that contributed to the breakup. This self-reflection will help you address those problems and evolve into a better person.

3.    Keep it Friendly

Whenever you run into your ex, maintain a positive and friendly attitude. Be polite, respectful, and show genuine interest in their well-being. Avoid dwelling on negative aspects of the past or engaging in arguments. Focus on the present and introduce lighthearted topics for discussion. If your ex seems nervous or you encounter awkward silence, try breaking the ice with humor. Presenting yourself as a constructive and supportive person can make them more open to the idea of reconciliation.

4.    Re-establish Communication Gradually

Once some time has passed and you’ve both had a chance to heal, you can re-establish communication in a casual and non-threatening manner. Start with simple and friendly messages, and slowly increase the frequency and depth of your conversations. Avoid pushing for a reunion too quickly; instead, let the connection develop naturally. You may consider it as a fresh start where you have to rebuild your relationship from scratch.

5.    Be Patient

Winning back a person takes time, and there are no guarantees. Patience is key in this process. Prepare yourself for the possibility that your ex may not want to patch up the broken relationship. If you think that you love your ex, know that their happiness comes first. If they move on or feel like you’re not the one for them, it’s a truth you’ll need to accept. You can hope that they might change their mind, but you cannot impose your love upon them.

6.    Apologize and take Responsibility

If you contributed to the breakup or hurt your ex in any way, it is crucial to sincerely apologize and take responsibility for your actions. Acknowledge your faults you and demonstrate that you are sorry for all the wrongs you committed. When your ex witnesses the positive changes within you, the chances of getting back together shall significantly increase.

7.    Maintain a healthy Social Life

Isolating oneself after a breakup is deteriorating for our mental health. Being alone will remind you of your ex continuously, leading to frustration and depression. You might begin obsessing over your ex and do something that drives them further away. It is important to surround yourself with supportive friends and engage in an adequate amount of social activities.

Having a fulfilling social life not only helps you move on from the breakup, but also shows your ex that you are capable of enjoying life without them. It may even make them curious about the changes they see in you.

8.    Showcase your Happiness

Radiate happiness and flaunt the positivity in your life, so your ex can see what they’re missing. Share joyful moments on social media (without overdoing it) and live your life to the fullest. Seeing you cheerful and content may pique your ex’s interest and make them wish that they were part of your happiness again. Remember that happiness is contagious with its good vibes, which is why it is usually impossible to resist a happy person.

9.    Keep in touch with mutual friends and acquaintances

Occasional interaction with mutual friends and acquaintances indirectly keeps you connected to your ex’s life. However, be cautious not to manipulate these connections or use them to pry into your ex’s personal life. It is essential to respect boundaries and maintain genuine friendships. The smart strategy is to share as much as possible about all the nice things happening in your life. Your ex is most likely to hear about you from them and it might encourage them to reach out to you.

10.   Be Authentic

It is a must to be yourself throughout this process. Do not try to be someone you’re not or pretend to have changed solely to win your ex back. Authenticity is key in building a healthy and long-lasting relationship. If your ex doesn’t like you for being you, understand that this is not meant to be. You might be able to fake it for a while and get their attention, but you won’t succeed at putting on the act forever. Sooner or later, the real you will reveal itself and your ex will abandon you again.


I hope the tips provided will help you get your ex back in style. If you do succeed, I hope you make it last and do not regret anything. That being said, keep in mind that these strategies should be used carefully for both you and your ex. Winning someone back should not be the sole purpose of your existence. Prioritize your own well-being and happiness above all else.

Depending on your case, a reunion may not be possible or advisable even if you do follow through these steps. Open your heart to the possibility of moving on and finding happiness with someone new if this doesn’t work out as expected. My suggestions may prove helpful, yet there is no guaranteed method for winning an ex back.

Ultimately, it is in your best interests to respect the other person’s feelings and decisions. If they have moved on, or are not interested in restoring a relationship, accept their choice and focus on more important aspects of your life. It is okay to grieve for someone you lost, but time will make everything better and you’ll realize that it was for the best.

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